graceland's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The weirdest night ever So dragged some people to Red Lobster in Times Square last night, because you know, I've never been to Red Lobster and I wanted to go. It definitely wasn't what I thought it was going to be. After Red Lobster, everything just got crazy. This guy friend and I split and smoked some pot and were walking around Times Square. I was going to take him to this dive bar in the area and as we walked there, some college-aged kids passed him and spontaneously, this chick says, "High Five" and without even flinching, he high fives as we walk. After a few more steps, I asked, "Did you just get high-fived in passing by a stranger?" and he said, "Why yes, I did" and I said, "That is fantastic." We spoke for a few minutes trying to recall the last time either of us had been walking down the street and either been high-fived or high-fived someone else. We walked through this really sketch area and I was scared and paranoid, which after getting through it, I realized that I shouldn't have been scared, I was walking with a 6'1" dude with a mohawk. I think he may have scared the derilects right back. So we hit this dive and it's filled with punkers and goths. We briefly walk in, music pumping, black hair dye and plaid everywhere and we walk out because my friend needs to get some money out of the ATM. We walk out of the door and are mid-gait across the sidewalk to the street, facing some punk girl, smoking a cigarette, who couldn't have been a day over 24. Coming toward us perpendicularly, is a group of 20-something alterna-kids. He and I step in step, when the kids, approaching me first, I watch in slow motion as one of the girls reaches out and cups my breast with her hand. My torso was leaning forward, I was midstep, so she got herself a nice handful, and I looked down and see her hand gently copping a feel. It was completely fucking surreal. I mean, this girl reached her hand under this cut-away cardigan I was wearing and cupped my breast through my tank top as she walked down the street. None of us miss a beat, she walks in front of me with her hand dropping behind her, my friend walks next to me not knowing what happened and and the goth punk smoker sees everything. The groper giggles and says, to me, as she feels me up, "Mmmmmmmmmmmmm, nice" and I, shocked, could think of nothing else to say but, "Yeah, you like that?" I heard her as she moving up the street, "Yeah I liked that. I liked it a lot. I would marry you. I'LL COME BACK HERE IN A YEAR AND MARRY YOU." By this point, I'm crossing the street with my friend, who is completely oblivious to the whole groping incident. I turn around, to see if I'm safe or if another attack is coming, and I see the punk/goth has now assumed the role of some sort of doomsday soothscreamer, looking back at me and nodding her head - like she's got my back or something - and she started screaming at the girl, "SHE'S NOT GOING TO MARRY YOU. SHE WON'T BE HERE IN A YEAR. NONE OF US WILL BE HERE IN A YEAR. HELL, THIS PLACE PROBABLY WON'T BE HERE IN A YEAR." I just kept walking. It took me a minute to process what had happened as my friend went to get money, when he came back out I told him and he was baffled. "That's what she was screaming about?" he asked. Yes. "Why do people always feel compelled to touch you," he asked. "Have you noticed that?" "I have and I don't know why, but I hate it," I said. I wanted to get out of the neighborhood at that point, I couldn't keep going there. I was unnerved. I felt like people were going to jump out of the darkness and touch me; violate me. This has happened before. I don't know why. We split and went downtown to this place his friend was working at and that turned out to be weird too. The place was dead, his friend was getting ripped on by the manager, the whole thing was a fiasco. We left and came uptown, stopped into our local, no one was there, and then went around the corner to a small bar where incidentally, was the first place that we became friends. I didn't think about that last night. We ended up in the little bar where I went after getting the heisman from the monster and I called this friend out of despair, knowing him only peripherally at the time, and he showed up with a bouquet of daisies and sincere kindness.So last night was weird and I guess also, a moment when things came full circle with this friend and in my life pattern. I certainly felt like a different person last night, completely unrelated to the hurt girl who sat in that bar and cried over a broken heart on a Saturday not too long ago. My birthday's on Wednesday and for the first time I don't feel depressed about it. I feel excited. I don't have some crazy unrequited crush right now, some impossible love situation, I'm not desperately searching for something that I can't put my finger on. I quit smoking, I quit other bad behaviors, I've started working out again. Maybe this year. Maybe this year I'll finally be happy with myself. 9:10 p.m. - 2005-05-16 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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