graceland's Diaryland Diary

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Free Falling into Life

Things are moving along really nicely in my life right now. I feel good, I've been getting into shape, work is busy and challenging but doable.

I'm reshaping some writing I did about a year ago to film a short with this guy I met. He's going to film a few vignettes about my life. Mostly me emoting or acting out scenes I wrote with voiceovers running my internal commentary. I don't really want to act as a profession, but it's something I've always wanted and feared, to expose myself on film. So we are doing that.

Right now is all about conquering my fears. I have more fears than I realized and I want to knock them each out of the way to get to my final and tallest walls, intimacy and rejection.

Once I let go of everything, I can start rebuilding. That's the goal.

I just feel really free and positive about everything in my life right now. The last year was a big transition period for me, filled with doubts and indecision. It was hard, because I've never been indecisive. That was new to me.

This is my year. I can feel it. I'm going to let go and see where it takes me. I'm really excited.

9:09 p.m. - 2003-11-18

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