graceland's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Time to Break Up I had a great weekend just relaxing with the old friends and family at the shore. Riding my bike and relaxing at the beach and drinking beers and making blender drinks while someone BBQed and the girls played poker and lorded over the upstairs stereo. Watching movies with my parents. Walking alone late at night and seeing the Big Dipper. It was great. Then I came back to NYC and went to work and therapy. Kinda ruined everything. This therapy thing - I don't like the idea of an outside source judging me. As much as I tell them - it will always be one sided. As much as I talk, they will never "get" each of us (my family) and our motives. They will never understand our individual stories. I don't like the responsibility that I feel it places on me. I don't like "my version" being out there because I think it's skewed. I think it's unfair. Something is not right with this. The therapist reminds me of my mom which is one weird thing and there's no connection between us, which is something else. She's someone else I need to entertain. It's not right or I'm not ready, one of the two. I have to break up with her. I'm just going to have to do it. And a mosquito is biting me raw right now, so I have to go. 1:07 a.m. - 2005-06-02 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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