graceland's Diaryland Diary

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There's no place like home

I am really blessed right now. This realization always comes out of nowhere to shock me.

I felt it on Saturday, when my phone was buzzing with calls and texts from the old crush and my best guy friend and this great new friend who is the bartender at the bar I hang out with. I owe my last crush a thanks for telling me to give the bartender a chance even though I had been put off by his matinee idol looks; I thought he was a player. He blows me away with his kindness. He called me on Saturday just to ask if I was ok after our talk the night before and then leaving with the drunken crush who was manhandling me like the psycho he is.

He called me again tonight to talk about Halloween, he's wearing this costume I begged him to wear and he agreed to wear just to make me happy. I told him I would just meet him out; he was bartending near my place.

I met him and we hardly talked because I met every single person in the bar while he served the ones I wasn't chatting up.

I met some really cool girls I've seen around the neighborhood but never chatted up because they seemed a lot younger than me and I'm not really the type to seek out new friends, they just kinda of evolve. Anyway, one girl told me she didn't have a costume and what she was thinking of being was something I had, so I offered to run home and grab it for her. I came back with that and some instruments I had been talking about with the DJ that he needed for his costume so the next thing I know, everyone is rocking out with my instrument collection around the bar.

We went outside, me and my new girls, to check out the lunar eclipse, and one of the girls told me that she had seen me walking that day and her boyfriend pointed me out as "that cool girl." She said that she always wanted to say hi but we had never been introduced. I told her she should have because I never know anyone's name so if someone even hints at a smile I say "hi" assuming we met somewhere and that I'm just in the dark on the association. Another girl told me that she was glad to meet me because the bartender friend of mine is always referencing things we talked about or did and she always wondered who I am.

Then to make things weirder, the DJ, his friend and I ended up having lived parellel lives in Manhattan for the last 10 years. They did the whole incestuous bar scene I used to do, they still work in it and even know one of my brother's college roommates, a big player on the scene. We listed off 10's of common friends and realized that we've known each other for years.

The only thing was that they were partying, hard. Ripping rails I assume from the teeth grinding, so I would excuse myself every so often to let them do the hand off without feeling like they had to share. I'm not partying right now.

I'm happy where I am at the moment. I don't want to party or head down that road again because things didn't work out the way I wanted to with a guy. I also don't want to date the wrong guy again to forget about the most recent train wreck. Things are really good. I don't need to do that.

So I hung with everyone, led an impromptu jam session, made plans to catch up with everyone tomorrow and over the weekend, bid adieu to my bartender friend and came home.

And the Red Sox won. Yay for them!

1:16 a.m. - 2004-10-28

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