graceland's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Sage Vegas was exhausting. I arrived in this bizarre state of mind and proceeded to work my ass off. It paralleled "Lost in Translation" as my companion there was an older gentlemen, married and we were thrown together because of the circumstances. We spent a great deal of time together, philosphizing, keeping each other company, laughing and toward the end of the trip he said to me, "Let me ask you, were circumstances different, if I were 30 years younger and not married or Jewish, would you have given me a chance?" We also had a spat on the last night there, he was unhappy with me for inviting other people along to our planned dinner, and shaken from his temper directed toward me in the lobby, we passed a younger man that we had been working with. A man that I have come in contact with a few times that I secretly crushed futilely as he showed no interest in me beyond business in the past. We said hello, and the man reached out and grasped my arm and quietly asked me if I had been crying. I was startled and said no. Dinner was tense and after dinner I parted from my companion, joining some salesmen we worked with at the bar. I laid into some cocktails. My week was over, it was my last night in Vegas. The men began to get vulgar after too many drinks, offering money for me to strip or sleep with them and I grew more and more uncomfortable. As I was about to remove myself from the group, the younger man appeared again and we began to speak. The group dissipated in his presence, he has a quietly dominating personality, one of strength and sophistication. He and I spent the next few hours talking. It was one of those long and brambling conversations you have when you are tired and drunk. I asked him about life and happiness, human nature, and we philosophized about what life is about. During this time he encouraged me to follow my dreams. To take big steps and go after what I want, even if it involved risks. We found that we had a shared appreciation in several artists and musicians and treasured time alone. As much as he revealed himself the more of a mystery he became to me. It was interesting. Sometime before 5am he announced he would be heading to bed and we went off in our separate directions. Surprisingly, he called me last night and left a message. He said that he wanted to touch base and see how I was doing. I called him back later today, thinking he had a question for me. Perhaps trying to track down a piece of art or furniture that we spoke about. He didn't call about that at all. He said that he was calling to follow up on our conversation. He wanted to know if I had given it more thought. That good things, big things, require a lot of work but he wanted to be sure that I had the confidence in myself that I could make whatever I wanted to happen. I really didn't know what to say. I *had* thought about our conversation, primarily wondering if he thought I was boring, insane or both. At one point, I had told him that he was a wise sage and I meant it - and I guess that could be perceived as a strange thing to say. That conversation was like so many others I have, searching, trying to understand, looking for clues to lead me to my next step. I can't recall all of the specifics of it, other than talking about opening up my own PR Firm. I assume that's what he is referring to. I said ernestly, "That's supernice of you to follow up with me, I really appreciate it," and he laughed a deep, manly laugh at me. He threw in one more word of encouragement and then he said that he's going to follow up with me again over the next few days. He said that I should expect to hear from him. And that was it. I'm not really sure what this means, but I think he may have just made me a project for himself. And considering my current state of confusion, I welcome that. Show me the way, sage. 8:09 p.m. - 2004-01-14 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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