graceland's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Night Filled with Surprises Last night was reminescent of my old life. I met A-guy out for drinks at our local bar and we chatted with the owner and some the regulars. Everyone collectively seemed to have had a bad day until an older gentleman came in and joined us at the bar. The owner knew the man, and asked him where he'd been. The man said that he just had his "gut cut open 5 weeks ago" and had been recovering at his house upstate. This was the first opportunity he'd had to drive down and pick up the mail that accumulates at his apartment here in Manhattan. The owner asked him if he'd like a soda since he was recovering and the man corrected the owner and said certainly not, that this was his first drink in 5 weeks. The rest of us chimed in, "Get that man a DRINK! That's what will heal what ails him!" and shaking his head laughing, the owner fixed him a Gin and Soda. We learned that the man was 80 years old. He didn't appear to be a day over 70. He was quickly responsive and his face was only marginally lined, his age showed more so in it's gauntness and skin that lost the fight to gravity. We spoke briefly, during which time he asked politely for a cigarette and we gave one to him. He seemed more happy to be back in the City and circulating among people than interested in anything we had to say and somehow, he lifted all of our spirits just sitting there with us. We spoke about the new findings that Greeks live the longest of any people with the lowest incidence of cancer and we all mused whether it was the stressless life of Greek Island living, the concentration of fish and vegetables in their diets, the higher ingestion of olive oil or simply the wine. Someone pointed out it might be all of the above and said that we are all dying from the stress and that the people who are living longer are the laborers - people who work hard out in fields all day doing an honest days work. The old man was relatively quiet during this conversation and suddenly he said, I don't know about that, some days just getting out of bed in the morning to face New York City is harder than a day working in a hot field. We all nodded in agreement, but this statement particularly hit home for me. It's something I've thought about often. Life in New York is hard. Harder than life in other places. What is it? So I asked the old man. "Why is it so hard here?" He turned to me and smiled like a bashful boy and said, "It just is, it's New York. Everything about living in this City is hard on her people. She doesn't make it easy on anyone." No she doesn't. She certainly does not. The old man left after a drink and we all seemed a little bit more light- hearted. Like he was sent to tell us that it's hard but we can make it. If he's making it, we *have* to to make it. After that, I met a work contact on the Upper West for drinks to talk life and business. We were at this terrible yuppie place where the suits oogle the bar filled with model-actress types in Sex in the City garb. I felt completely out of place in my jean skirt and long-sleeved black shirt, but clocked the time for my friend. As I was trying to sneak out, I was introduced to some of her guy friends, just about what you would expect: the trader, the corporate raider and the lawyer. Something in my head went off, and I decided to be friendly; too my surprise, they were friendly in return. Two of them were even, dare I say it, witty and kind-hearted. By end of the evening I had traded quips and laughing winks with the lawyer, as the pretty girl to his right shook her head and said to both of us, "I just can't follow you two." The trader and I exchanged cards with the promise to e-mail, after he shared a personal story with me about discovering late in life a family member whom he had never known, tracking her down in Canada, and meeting a woman that instantly became a core part of his life today. He told me that I reminded him of that woman, because she was someone met with no expectations and she turned out to be really cool. "You're really cool," he said. Most of the time, after living the life I've led, I say that nothing surprises me anymore. I've seen and heard and experienced so many unthinkable and outrageous things. And then a night like last night happens. 7:23 p.m. - 2003-07-23 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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